Archive | November 2015

Why blog and share? -xiaoyi

Since it’s my birthday today, I wanted to share some of my story with all of you.  -xiaoyi

 http://www.clipartbest.com/

http://www.clipartbest.com/

Hello, I’m xiaoyi Drake, at one point in my life Diana Bristol.  I was born and raised in Colorado, mostly as white-trailer-park-trash.  It was not expected that I nor any of my sisters would go to college and we were told rather young that with so many girls and being so poor that my parents would not be able to pay for our weddings.  They would then joke, “ So find someone rich honey! It’s the only way out.”

I often struggled in school and even at my best could not maintain a 4.0 GPA.  When I graduated high school I had managed to drag my GPA up to a 3.75 which was just enough to be three people under the top 10% that got to graduate with honors.  In many ways that was the story of my life.  Always good but never quite good enough to break through to the life I wanted on the other side of that barrier.

I struggled to work my way through college.  It took 13 years and agreeing to huge student loan debt to get my Bachelor’s degree. I thought that degree  would get me out of debt and working at a job I loved.  One of the reasons it took so long was that I was constantly in pain and lost many jobs as well as having to miss a lot of class and do make up work.   Three years prior to my graduation, I had lost yet another job due to attendance issues but the doctors were finally able to figure out why I was in so much pain all of the time.  Fibromyalgia.  At the time I was diagnosed, there was very little known about this chronic pain condition or how to treat it.  We had a name for it but that was all.

I did marry during this time.  I met a wonderful man, Dominic, with a passion for learning that equals mine.  I am with him still today and look forward to sharing the rest of my life with him. It was hard on him to see me in pain and not be able to help.  On really bad pain days, I think he is in more emotional pain because he cannot help me, than I am in physical pain.  Now there are treatments and medications but like with diabetes they have not found a cure and we can only treat the symptoms.

One of the hardest things about having fibro is that it has prevented me from being able to work 8 hour days at a traditional job. Some days I hurt so bad i can’t get out of bed.  If you imagine a body-wide migraine with really bad arthritis in your muscles as well as all of your joints and you have a pretty good idea of what a bad pain day feels like.  That really isn’t conducive to a steady work environment.  I have been able to maintain a small house-cleaning business where I schedule a day off between clients to recover.   I have dealt with depression and guilt over being such a financial burden to my husband even though he has never complained about it.  I have looked for many ways to bring in a little bit here and there for us and tried to bring him joy.

Now there is a way for me to stop being a burden to him and to make enough money, even on pain days, to help support us instead of him having to do all the work.  Michelle Pescosolido did it using the same system we are.  While many people poo-poo network marketing and internet income, we are making it a reality.  I found a company that promotes self-growth and learning even as it sells travel.  I get to learn from Ray Higdon, Tyson Zahner and Cesar Chavez among many others who have made network marketing and internet income a reality.  And Dominic and I are going to follow in their footsteps and share how we do it step by step along the way.  We are going to share our joys and trials with you and let you learn with us and from us just as our teachers have done for us.

I am going from a “dependent” and “financial drain” to an “asset” in my own mind and in my own life.  It’s a big change and there will be hurdles.  I know I will overcome them and Dominic will be by my side as he always is.  Please follow us here and on our blog at www.WithTheDrakes.com and follow our journey into success.

-xiaoyi

Life’s too short to have bad days!  What are you doing to make today FANTASTIC?

Longing to Fire My Boss. How About You?

blog.fired

Trudging through another day at the 9-5 I find myself longing to fire my boss and step into a new life, a life that is completely about the world I want to live in, the journey I wish to take. As I still typing out another email to a client so that the company can get more money, I get to thinking about the reasons that I want out of this job and what will change once I am able to fire my boss.

The first hurdle I face is the “get to work on time”. Doesn’t really matter how I feel or what the weather is like, I am forced to push through both illness as well as rain and snow to arrive at my desk at a set time every day and when something gets in the way of that, I get to start off the day by being reprimanded by someone who is there for no other purpose than to babysit adults. Additionally, it is expected that I make up that time during my breaks and lunch time, conveniently ignoring any overtime that I have put in over the past week or month.  Then the overall picture hits as review time comes up each year as I  get judged on my performance by how many times that I fell ill over the year. This is not a set of hoops that I want to continue to jump through all the time and the journey that xiaoyi and I have stepped out on will solve that problem and allow me to ignore the weather and be treated with compassion when I am ill since my boss will be myself.

The next hurdle I face every day is the scrutiny of those above. It isn’t enough that I get to work, put in my time and outperform all my fellow employees, but I have do it all in the exact way and method that those above me have decreed.  Errors are not an option in this setup. It doesn’t matter to those people who judge that out of the hundreds of activities I get done each week that I only make an error on a couple, those errors are the source of all discussions and performance plans. It makes it very difficult for me to really care about the company when my downfalls are the only aspect of me that is elevated into the light. On the new journey, mistakes are a source of joy instead of a means of control over me. Mistakes are the more powerful source of learning that humans go through, and since this entire journey is about learning and teaching, there is no stronger tool in my arsenal then the mistake I make.

Finally, there is oppression of the same routine day in a day out. There isn’t anything in one day to pull it out from the pack of all the rest of the days unless something negative happens. When the only times of the day that I look forward to are lunch and 5pm, it creates a listless and apathetic outlook on life. The life of an automaton is not the life that inspires joy and fulfillment in me. I want to wake everyday looking forward to every aspect of that day, not just 25% of it. Getting this new life off the ground and being able to charge into it full time is the light at the end of the tunnel, and I will make that tunnel as short as possible.

Here is a great video of someone who has done just want I want to do and fire their boss, take a look and indulge in the living vicariously, imagine how happy being in their shoes would make you. Then look at where you are and tell me what the energy sinks you deal with everyday are and how your journey will destroy them!

-Dominic

Life is too short to have bad days!  What are you doing to make today FANTASTIC?

as always we appreciate hearing your comments below.

The 4 Steps to Success!

capitalcampaignmagic

Hey all, hope the world is treating you right today. I just watch a presentation by Ray Higdon  and had a blast. The presentation was about blogging and how important it is to move forward in this journey, but that isn’t what I want to talk about today. What I want to talk about is a concept that he presented at the beginning of this presentation.

If you have been following us, you know that I have created a change in my mind set so that everything I do becomes an opportunity to learn and grow. The concept that Ray shared supports that idea perfectly. Here is the success formula.  Don’t be IL(invest and learn), be ILTP (Invest, Learn, Teach, Profit).

This cycle of ILTP is all we need to move through to become a success in our journeys and it really hits home for me. First of, we have to Invest. This is not just an investment of our money; it is more an investment of our time and energy in ourselves. We each need to go out there and invest our time and energy in learning new things,  watching new webinars or training, new readings, new everything. From there, we Learn something from what we’ve invested in, ideas that opened our eyes or just ones that might help to open other people’s eyes.

Now comes the really hard part for me, Teach! We have to take the ideas that we just learned and actually present them to others so that they can learn new things too. When we do this, we are creating content which creates value to the people that we are presenting it to. Once we give people something of value, we begin to build connection with each other and trust.

That is what leads into the final step of Profit. When people trust you, you can point them at the products or services that have helped you so much and they will be more inclined to look into them.

This third step is where most people seem to stop. They invest time and money, effort and energy into learning new things, but they never take them out and teach them. They are afraid of how people will see them, but if you do not Teach, then you will never build Trust and therefore never succeed! Here is me taking that third step and you can do it just as easily!

If you are interested in getting a deeper understanding and a simple breakdown of this as well as a great resource to start building your own blog and creating these connections, take a look at Ray Higdon’s 3-Minute Expert, you won’t be disappointed!

 

Image credit: http://capitalcampaignmagic.com/

State of Mind

beecreativelyoucom free-your-mind
 


As I start my travels and learning in this new journey, I am finding a theme that keeps coming up over and over. The idea that the most important thing to do to be successful is to change my state of mind; the framework that I see myself in and that I see the world in.

Every time I have run into this, it is presented as a needful thing and something that I just need to do! But how do I get that done? Everyone of us has the demons in the back of our mind that cry out that we are not worthy enough, or good enough, or smart enough to be successful and live the lives that we want to live. The idea behind changing our state of mind is to silence those demons, or a least gag them, so that we can move forward in our lives and be confident in our beliefs.

The challenge I kept facing in my efforts to change my outlook is finding ways to have ammo to use against those demons so that I could change my mindset. For me, it wasn’t simply a matter of flipping a switch in my head and having a new outlook on life. So for me, it was not about suddenly believing that I was worthy, it was about changing the definitions that surround my concepts to support the new belief structure.

One of the biggest hurdle that I am working on overcoming, that thought of “work”. To me, “work” has been something that I do so that I can enjoy the rest of my life, the shorter and more profitable the “work” the better. In this new endeavor that xiaoyi and I are undertaking, the assumption is that we will be “working” 24/7, 365 days a year to be successful and to have the life that we want to lead. With my definition of “work” in place, this does not obtain the freedoms that I am looking to have. In fact, with my definition of “work” it takes away the little freedom I do have.

So how do I overcome that? How do I silence the demon that tells me that I will be doing nothing but working from here on out and have to give up the things that I love such as travel and time with friends?

The answer came while on a trip this past weekend and it came in the form of an understanding about this new endeavor and what the “work” we put into it looks like. There is the “work” of sitting at a computer and typing out things like this, or watching training videos and posting ads, but that is all peripheral to the real work that we do. The real work that we do is on self-improvement and in living our lives the way that we want to, and this was the mental change that I underwent. No longer are the trips out to another city to do sightseeing a thing that I only get to do outside of “work”, but now they are part of work, an opportunity to learn something new and find a way to apply those thoughts to my new life. They become an opportunity to meet people that want to move outside their daily “work” routine and make changes in their lives as well.

Changing my state of mind was not a flip of a switch; it was seeing the world that I live in and move through in a different light, to see the opportunities for self-growth and understanding and how I can share that growth with those around me. My time sitting around with friends and a good bottle of wine is now work and I am loving it. Every step I take from here on out is work  and another step towards the life I want to live, and it all starts in the mind.


image courtesy of http://beecreativelyou.com/free-your-mind/

Bravery and Bears

Thank you to all who have been brave enough to serve and protect!

 

Often when we talk about people being brave we talk about soldiers, heroes and survivors.  We tend to forget about those things each of us do every day that is brave.  Bravery means feeling fear and taking action anyway.  We all feel small amounts of fear every day.  We are inundated with messages about not being good enough unless we buy this or that; the news tells us all the time about how dangerous the world we live in is.  So we are encouraged to feel fear at almost every turn.

Yesterday while shopping at Costco, I saw a pile of huge bears.  My first thought was, “I want to jump in and snuggle them!” my second thought was, “I will look foolish and get laughed at.”  There it was.  Fear.  Fear of judgement and looking foolish.

I stared at that thought for a good minute while I was pushing my cart ever closer to the bears.  I could feel the fear trying to stop me.  I don’t like feeling afraid.  I also know that facing down our fears is the only way to overcome them.  So I decided right then and there that I was not only going to jump right in to that bear pile in the middle of the store, I was also going to take a picture of myself doing so and share it online.  Let people laugh if they want to! And I hope you will laugh because I laughed as I jumped into that giant pile of bears and I laughed and enjoyed life in spite of the fears.  Laughter is a way to know you are enjoying life.

So be brave today!

Jump into life and enjoy it!

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Life is too short to have bad days! What are you doing to make today great?

I jumped into a pile of bears :>  

Thank you to all who have been brave enough to serve and protect!

Prologue – Dominic

Personal:

Now where to start? I(Dominic) am a native of Colorado and spent my early years on a horse ranch outside Boulder. Learned a lot about hard work from that upbringing and learned that physical labor was a life path that I didn’t want to pursue.

I went to high school at Fairview where I played soccer and found a passion for my life. During that time playing soccer I was able to go on an international trip to Germany and London with my team. That opened my eyes to the joys and wonders of other cultures and fueled my desire to learn more about diverse cultures.

This lead me into my college career and my eventually Bachelors in Anthropology. At that time I was working the graveyard shift at a hotel full time trying to make ends meet and afford school. It is also where I met my wife and we found a shared passion in the culture and history of China. This passion was cemented for life when we took a 2 week trip to China and toured several cities and dozens of cultural sites. We knew that, together, this is the life that we wanted, to travel and learn about the world and people outside our home.

My anthropology degree led me into doing some contract archaeology work in the south west. It was good time, but I found that there just wasn’t enough cultural change between Colorado and the nearby states to satisfy my thirst for foreign cultures. The time alone and away from my wife, who stayed home, was also a strain on my life.

To try and get back to something that would allow my dreams to bloom, I took a job in Denver selling insurance. I have been doing that for a little over a year now, but the future it holds for me, though stable, does not fulfill my dreams of travel and financial security.. That is why, when my wife discovered and shared with me a new way to travel AND make money, we jumped on it and are starting to build our dreams with our own hands rather than hope the world hands them to us.

If you want to travel with us sometime, please let us know and we would be delighted to have you join us.